More questions than answers

Is it me or is it just generally annoying when someone says I need you to (fill in the blank), versus I’d like you to (fill in the blank) or could/would you please (fill in the blank)?

Is this a rare example of when it is acceptable not to give a scratch about someone else’s needs? Is it me or is it just more motivating (and downright more polite) to be asked to do something versus being breathlessly compelled to jump through a hoop in order to fulfill someone’s need?

Which produces better results? Which builds stronger, positive relationships?

Don’t get me wrong, if you and I are throwing back wings and beer and a little chicken cartilage goes down the wrong pipe and you wheeze, John, I need you to give me the Heimlich…fear not, as I will be on  you faster than Charlie Sheen on a stripper. If you need me call me, no matter where you are, no matter how far, don’t worry baby (Thank you Marvin)!

Helping is fun and being asked politely to help is even more fun (being aware, present and stepping in to help without being asked, well that’s another conversation). It just seems that the polite part is eroding away like my hairline in the mid 90s.

Have scowling demands replaced pleasant requests? Is it that we need what we need, when we need it and we don’t need to be polite about it?

Is it just the pace of our frantic society? Is it me getting sensitive in my advancing middle age?

As the title to this post states, I have more questions than answers, and yes, I know, this is a personal dilemma. I don’t need you to agree with me on this one.

Well, to bring this home with a happy ending, here’s what I’ll offer. You have my open-ended permission to smack me around if I ever forget my manners and impolitely bark out my needs.


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