Keep the change

A couple of days ago I was working in my company’s satellite office – an office with a vending machine in dangerously close proximity to my desk. This dreaded vending machine offers Pop Tarts (rarely do I mention brands in these pages, but when it comes to Pop Tarts, there are no substitutes). It was around 3 PM and time for my late afternoon feeding. In a matter of mere seconds, I rationalized a myriad of reasons why it was OK for me to have an afternoon Pop Tart (I did pushups this morning, I walked up the stairs, it’s warmer out so I’ll sweat more and burn calories).

Fully empowered and justified, with a whimsical skip in my stride, I went to the machine, inserted my dollar, made my selection and as the drool ran down my goatee, my high fructose foreplay was interrupted when the machine flashed those heart breaking words … please insert exact change.

My drool turned to tears.

Oh how I wished I carried around hundreds of dollars in coin like the old timers who jingled change when the collection plate passed by in church when I was a kid.

Dejected and unfulfilled, I retrieved my useless paper money (Did I see old George looking judgmentally at me?) and sulked back to my desk. And then it happened, I remembered I still had an orange left over from my mid morning feeding – my mid morning snacking that was interrupted by something since forgotten (well, not really forgotten, but you know how I feel about crossing that line and going too deeply in the details of making the donuts!).

Instead of shamefully consuming guilt-laden empty carbs, I held my head up high and enjoyed the sticky, juicy, sweet nectar of Floridian (or was it Brazilian?) goodness. Ecstasy! (If I had more than one and a half lungs, I might have lit up and basked in the citrusy afterglow!)

Oh I still have the Pop Tart monkey on my back, but I know it’s an addiction that can be overcome thanks to an intervention of slow burn carb, fiber-rich natural goodness.

Thank you ‘exact change only’ vending machine!

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7 comments

  1. Lanre

    Well, I guess that vending machine helped you control your food cravings. You thought you were doing yourself some good by taking a Pop Tart but it knew better and made you eat something more healthy.

    Like

  2. Aja

    I’m glad the vending machine setback worked out for the good!

    Have you ever actually tried to substitute a Pop-Tart for say, a store brand generic version? I have. *Shudders at the memory*

    Like

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